I'm siiting out on my balcony jamming to the plain white t-s and looking out at Dubai. Had another terrible day yesterday. I have a tyrant for a chief. I dont understand why she's all over my ass all the time.  Ive never been in trouble in the Navy until I got here. Ive been to two different commands and never even been looked at wrong for anything. I come to work do my job, I dont complain.....much. Lately I have because I feel singled out for stuff that EVERYONE here does. Such as curfew which is 1200 pm here.... how can this woman yell at me about curfew when she was at the Rock Bottom (the bar we all go to...) buying drinks for people and dancing with cody well after curfew like it was nothing. If I had been there she would have been all over it. BAH. I just wanna shank her. It makes me feel better that my Master Chief can't stand her...haha he was on the smoke deck one day ( I love being a smoker..) Just dogging on her on the phone to someone. Hopefully the rumors about her getting sent back to bahrain are true and I'll be rid of my new arch nemesis.

"Gotta get away from here find a way to disappear, say goodbye to everone and everything I know, gotta go and leave this town all it does is bring me down"

So It really has been a long time since I wrote in here. I bet no one has looked in this dusty thing for ages. I'm 21 years old now and its amazing how much has changed in two years....and how much hasn't. I'm still in the Navy. Not exactly loving it but it's a job right?? The Navy has taken me to Bahrain and now to Dubai in the UAE (United Arab Emirates for the non-middle east savvy).  Things arent starting out so great here. In fact everything is a mess. I have to laugh because I cant think of very many times in my life that things werent chaotic and filled with drama. How does that happen anyway?? Lord only knows. I wish he would let me in on it.  Yesterday I felt like Jim Carey in Bruce Almighty...LOL. "God is just a big, mean kid on an ant hill". Then I proceeded to drink half a bottle of Jack and wallow like a big baby all day. The worst kind of chaos is the kind where you play it over and over again and psycho analyze the hell out of it  UGHHH.  If God were really like Morgan Freeman maybe he would quit laughing at me messing up all the time and mop a floor with me or something??  Wishful thinking I suppose. The worst part of being here is the feeling of being utterly, entirely ALONE. You cant trust anyone here. So theres no one to talk to.... I just need a hug. Hopefully tomorrow wont drag on as long as I think it will. Also, if anyone cares about the well being of other Sailors here in Dubai, pray that I don't prison shank any of my co-workers. Smite me oh mighty smiter indeed.......<br>

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Amen

Well hey there good ol blogdrive......It really has been forever and a day since I have written on here. I miss it. So my story for the last 8 months or so has been insane! I joined the Navy last summer and graduated bootcamp last November. Bootcamp was fun, learned alot, yay. I met a wonderful man (not navy...eesh) who I have been with for 6 months. I'm stationed in San Diego, CA and my 20th b-day is on tuesday. I have been beat up, run ragged, OC sprayed in the face, gassed...but I'm still here. Ive realized that I have to work ten times harder then any man in the Navy to get somewhere because 75 percent of the women in the Navy are useless. Sexual discrimination would be a vast understatement. I learned that organization is a good thing, therefor I have aquired a mild case of OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder), yeah no joke. haha. Jerry is still hanging out in Alaska....salsa dancing, and whatever else it is you do in Alaska to keep your mind off of how freaking cold it is there. He'll never admit that he was wrong again.....so life goes on. I am just one undesignated seaman, and I cant do everything....even though I try. Till I can get this graduation picture to post....Son of a B....work...

The fourth of july is just another holiday set in my path to remind me of what a loser I am....Well halfway...I went to a party at Shannon's house. AHhhh a bunch of drunken people on a rooftop in downtown Seattle watching Gaswork's park fireworks. Right freaking on.

4th of july whoopidy doo

This entry she is no more

Oh Lord....I thought pigs would fly before this day came. I have decided after I get my degree in Criminology I will (sit down for this one) join the....Navy. I know I know...never sell your soul to the government blah blah blah. I say the whole thing too. But I suppose it would be the quicker way into the CIA. They like that better anyways...less money THEY have to spend on training me. So I have four years left of enjoyiing my soul while it is still mine. I was going to do the law enforcement route but I might be 40 by the time I made my way up to CIA and then what would be the point?? I have an appointment tomorrow morning to speak with oone of the Gestapo's I mean Recruiters...haha. I guess I should quit harping on these people. SO how did I get to the Navy as my choice?? The Coast Guard are a bunch of pansies...I am soo not a pansy ( I'm hardcoore beeotch--lol...hmmm back on track...) The marines are like the Big toe you stick in the water to see how cold it is (they're the first ones to get sent in and blown to Hell) I just plain don't like the Army and my dad was in the Airforce. So the Navy it is. Ahoy Maytee....lol now I can KINDA be a Pirate. My true life's ambition.

"Who am I? I am who I say I am and tomorrow someone else entirely."

There is no text book definition for Pathological Liar. A person with this mental disease is also called a Compulsive Liar, Compulsive being that they do something and are unable to stop themselves from doing it. Call it a white lie. Call it exaggerated truths. Thrust into the fiery pits of Hell for all of eternity. No? Such a burden on ones soul to tell so many lies in one day and lose count in a matter of a year. One's childhood memories could all be a figment of imagination....Eventually believing ones own lies to be truths when in all actuality they or course are not. Its a liar's throne and a cheater's crown. How Darwin's theory proves true, even after all of these years.

yeah...that my new theory. LOL. I havent been quite as interactive with this thing as I should be. I've had alot of things going on in the past couple of weeks. First I am dying (yea there goes the dramatic stuff) so okay maybe I am not dying but I have had severe abdominal pain for a week now and I have been to two different doctors and been stabbed a million times (now I look like a heroin addict...) and noone can tell me what is wrong. They thought it was appendisitis on friday...they were going to cut me open. EEk! Good thing they did 2 CT scans and ruled that out. So now I am on antibiotics and have no idea what is wrong with me and I hurt. I have missed two odays of work so far today I went in but they were already on their last patient . Cathy told me I was a nut and should go home anyways....lol. Its so great having 10 mothers.

Ive been kind of dating around. I like them but I find myself comparing everything about them to Jerry. I dont want to do that to these guys. So I give up for a while.

Who has heard the Backstreet Boys' new song. HAHA. Yeah theyre back. I dont get it though cos they're all about 30 now and dont have the same audience. Silly Backstreet Boys......

Here's a tidbit:

I Am Coyote

Coyote is a fun-loving goofball and that fits you to a T. Playfully silly, you appear somewhat bumbling at times, and your goofy exterior sometimes makes people forget what a quick mind and razor wit hides behind that amiable grin. In the mythos of the Plains tribes, Coyote is also a Creator, and stole fire as a gift for mankind. Your gift to the world is the creative fire of your quick, capable mind.

Which Trickster Are You?
Take the Trickster Test at www.isleofdreams.net.

I found out the other day that my biological mother is coming here this weekend for my aunts wedding (which I am certainly not going to considering that bitch hasnt talked to me since I left Seattle 4 years ago....Oh yes I hold grudges....) I am doing anything I can to make sure that I do not run into her. And since I am pretty sure that she wont come knocking on my brothers door, that is where I'll be this weekend. Oh man I looked on Ulti Web today to see how much my paycheck is going to be and man did it make me feel better about working like a dog for these past couple of weeks. I am sooo looking forward to this weekend. On saturday I am going with some people to The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Sweet Jesus, if you dont know about that movie then you must leave now....go! Youre fired! Just Joshing you. Either way I am stoked cos that show never dissapoints. All the freaks in Seattle seem to find their way to that theatre somehow.

Well since I have to wake up in another 5 hours I should go an dat least pretend to be asleep. For who?? mmmm....ya got me. Starbucks will surely be calling in the morning.